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Do happy couples exist? Absolutely. Research from around the world shows that at least 10% of all married people are really happy. What’s more, marital happiness contributes far more to personal happiness than anything else, including work and friendship satisfaction!

Do Happy Couples Really Exist? Why Should You Care?

This is a key question, whether you are single, newly divorced,  dating a person who could be the One, or involved in a relationship that has lasted a while but you are struggling to get a commitment! If your goal is being in a happy, committed lasting love relationship, then you need to understand and clearly visualize that goal or vision if you hope to be successful. Which means you have to know what a healthy relationship looks like. In fact, if you don’t, you’ll just stumble around, facing heartbreak after heartbreak, feeling alone and lonely. Unfortunately, a soul mate does not just come to you as a perfectly fitting puzzle piece or twin personality. So a soul mate is a person who develops and maintains a state of living love in word and deed with you.

Chances are you have had few role models of a win-win relationship; the kind of true love that makes you healthier, happier, and wealthier. It may be hard to envision this kind of relationship for yourself and challenging to learn the skills that happy couples routinely use. Until now!

Do Happy Couples Really Exist? The Great News

The great news is that you can learn these skills and practice them with people around you (they will immediately make you happier!).  This, in turn, will help you become the person who could be in a healthy, loving, lasting love. We have seen this happen in our coaching program with people from all kinds of challenging childhood and relationship backgrounds, including those who were abandoned  or experienced traumas in childhood and those who have been betrayed, left or wounded in their love relationships as adults!  Which means there is hope of finding lasting true love, no matter what you have been through.

Do Happy Couples Really Exist? How Happy Couples Work

There is a commonality among happy couples. The ways in which they talk and act with each other are strikingly similar and 180 degrees different from what goes on in unhappy relationships. Researchers have identified almost all of these healthy patterns, or what I call the Habits of Living Love, by studying tens of thousands of happy couples. My husband, Sam, and I studied the skills of happy couples at our Institute for Comprehensive Family Therapy and have used them in our own lab, our marriage.