I just sent you a couple of sweet private messages 🥰 Check them out when you can 💓😘 I’ll be waiting 😉

I(18F) have been with my boyfriend (18M) for almost two years now. We both had to move away from home for college last year in August and we get to see each other after 3-4 months. When we first started dating neither of us was sure about being together in college but as time passed we realised we love each other a lot and decided to continue. We were very confident about it in the beginning because before college we would rarely fight and would understand each other very well, we were both very patient and fights weren’t exactly fights, just a sad discussion. That has changed now, we argue almost every week and sometimes even raise our voices at each other over call.

Sometime after he moved to college (I can remember when exactly) | stopped feeling like a girlfriend. We don’t have conversations anymore, we just update each other and talk about what we did all throughout the day. We don’t talk about things other than us. He used to flirt with a lot, it would make me go speechless but he doesn’t do that anymore. I told him about it multiple times and he says he’s working on it but I just don’t feel that he wants to flirt with me anymore.

His reasoning is that I don’t show him love but try my best to, l’ve done everything he’s asked me to do to make him feel more loved and I try to be better everyday because I really want this relationship to work. It took me quite some time to start doing all of those things and have done somethings out of jealousy that I feel extremely guilty aboutnot cheating fyi) but I’m working on myself and even plan on starting therapy.

One of the things he asked me to do was send him pictures of me so that he could look at my face but recently he stopped complimenting me when I’d send him pictures. He didn’t stop entirely but he complimented me maybe twice or thrice everyday compared to the 20+ times that he used to. This made me feel as though he didn’t want to look at me. I already don’t feel good about the way I look and on top of that I’m really stressed all the time because of my course (I’m doing medicine) because of which I’ve been losing a lot of sleep which further made me feel ugly.

I brought this up with him and he said he’d compliment me more but he hasn’t been doing it. So this week I decided to not send him pictures unless he asked himself. I did it for 5 days and he asked 2 times which again made me feel like he simply doesn’t want to look at me. I brought it up again and we got into a huge argument.

When we first started long distance, I was the one who was usually at fault. However, I’ve been working on myself and making sure I don’t get mad at silly things. But the argument we had somehow turned into a discussion about everything I had done wrong in the past. Twice during the argument he said that we should break up but regretted it immediately. We resolved it but I was still a little upset. We talked on call for 15 mins in the night and I was visibly upset all through the call and he asked my why.

He didn’t seem to be bothered by the argument we had prior to it at all. I had to leave to do some work and he said he’d call me before sleeping. after I said was done with the work I texted him to ask when he’d call and he said he wants to go sleep. Any other day I would’ve said okay but I just wanted to talk to him nicely after the argument. Then we got into another fight about how I’m not understanding and I told him I just wanted to talk nicely. In the end we decided we should just forget about the argument, we had a short conversation about our day again and went to sleep. We havent properly talked since.

I really want this relationship to work because both of us love each other so much. I need advice on how to navigate this. What do I do?

Tldr: Need advice navigating ldr when both of us feel unloved by the other, especially due to busy college schedules